Great news! The Tapestry Standard is going to start a wholesale to trade area of the store. It’s going to be a few months before it’s rolled out but I wanted to give a heads up to any of my readers who are home decor related business owners. It will be a simple sign up process, we’ll just need your Tax ID and business license to get started.

I’m excited about starting this new branch of The Tapestry Standard and I’ll keep you updated as things move along.

“Uni’s get all the credit; nobody cares about the Deutercorns,” thought Amphora.

Amphora was a lonely Deutercorn, some would say the loneliest because he was the only one left.  This was like a free pass to do all sorts of things so for the sake of this blog we have revoked this title from Ampora and just call him sort of lonely (this made Amphora cry Deutercorn tears – which were sharp enough to kill kittens).

If Amphora, the Deutercorn, had a golf green representing his loneliness he would be standing on the fringe holding a hush sign watching Liger Forest putt in the winning putt.  Liger Forest was the bravest, most-noble Unicorn and got credit for everything, even when he didn’t do anything, which was most of the time.  Amphora hated Liger Forest, especially because he was only part Unicorn (which didn’t make sense since Amphora was only about three-quarters himself).  His other half was oriental panda – for some reason no one seemed to notice his black legs, but Amphora did.

Standing there holding the vertical “Hush” sign above his two horns made the Deutercorn feel oppressed.  He tried lowering it, but that didn’t help, it still said the same thing.  It is like everyone was telling him to eat some peanut butter and sell out like his cousin Ed.

Hush.  Hey Deutercorn!  Why don’t you Hush!!!!!!  Hush!!!!!!  HUSH!!!!!!!!!  It was driving him mad… it was as if it was mocking him because he couldn’t speak!!!!!!  Arggggghhhhhhh!!!!!!!  The strange thing about this is that Deutercorns can’t read or write (imagine writing with hooves… no please do and tell me what it’s like, I’m betting it sucks.)

Suddenly, the Deutercorn snapped and crowned everyone even the last unicorn, Liger Forest, over the head with his hush sign then followed it up with a corning from his horns.  It was a sad day for corns of all types, shapes, and sizes (it is not always the size of the corn, it is how you use it and boy did Amphora use it).   You would have thought some would have stayed home considering Nostrocornus’s prophecy that the “Forest will fall down and bury the last of the magical things including possibly unicorns or something like them.”  It was like they read thier obituary and just had to see if it was right.  Plus everyone was mesmerized by Liger Forest’s skills with his panda hooves so they had to come and check it out.

When the corning was complete, the Deutercorn took his own life in one swift double-corn maneuver (don’t ask me how that is possible just believe).

Now all the unicorns and other golf playing magical beasts can only be seen in artistic depictions. I think we should all take a moment of our time to sit back and thank the last Deutercorn for doing us all a favor, magical beasts have always been jerks.

Hey hey! I just wanted to let everyone know that tomorrow the second tapestry story from our guest blogger will be posted. To whet your appetite this one is about our unicorn wall tapestries and is, in my opinion, very funny. So check back tomorrow afternoon for some unicorn shenanigans that will give you a laugh.

Hey hey, The Tapestry Standard has some exciting new things coming in 2009 and we can’t wait to get started. Here are some of the new developments you can expect in the coming months:

• 3 full new tapestry lines including a beautiful selection of medieval tapestries that will knock your socks off!
• Weekly featured product sales – got your eye on a particular tapestry? Give us a shout and we’ll add it to the discount list
• Tapestry collections – some pieces are better together and we’re not only going to show you which ones but also give you discounts for buying them together
• Even better design advice and customer support – those of you who have ordered from us before know we provide top notch support but we’ve expanded our team to make it even better

That’s just the beginning. We’re looking to make 2009 the best year yet for us, you, and your home decor. We’re always open to suggestions so please feel free to drop us a line or comment.

And to start this year the way it ought to be, here is a brand new blog only tapestry discount. Enter coupon code tapblog2009 at checkout from now until January 31st to receive 12% off any order over $50. Let’s get 2009 off on the right foot!